Hypothetical Thursday

This is the beginning of a series of original weekly posts which pose hypothetical questions. I am fascinated by “what if?” and “would you rather?” questions, so I thought I’d write some and post them here just for fun. Join in by leaving a comment with your answer and/or explanation. [Photo courtesy of kimonomania]

You’re sitting in the doctor’s office, just having finished your annual physical exam. No news; you’re in good health, so you stand up to leave and the nurse walks in again. The nurse assures you everything is fine, but he’d like to ask you an important question. You’ve been randomly selected to participate in a very important scientific experiment, one that less than one tenth of a percent of patients have the opportunity to do.

He gently explains that brain scientists have been researching and experimenting with drugs that produce instant knowledge by targeting nano-specific areas of the brain. You have the option of being administered a shot that has a 50% chance of immediately making you fluent in two foreign languages of your choice (while still retaining your native tongue). After taking the shot, he explains, you will immediately be fluent in these languages with no sign of an accent; they’ll feel totally natural rolling off the tongue, as if you’ve been speaking them since infancy. But there’s only a 1 in 2 chance of this happening. They’re still working some kinks out, the nurse says.

Unlike most experimental drugs, which produce a myriad of side-effects, this shot only produces one, but it’s a big one. If the shot fails in making you fluent (a 50/50 chance), there is then a %90 chance that you will lose the ability to taste for the rest of your life. You will still be able to eat and drink as normal, but you will have no recognition of taste.

Again the nurse reminds you that this has been thoroughly tested, and these are the only two possible effects of this experimental shot. It is not a requirement to participate, but all you need to do to opt in is sign the page and mark which two languages you’d like.

Do you take the shot? Why or why not?

Comfort for the devil

An ancient Christian legend:

When the Son of God was nailed to the cross and died, he went straight down to hell from the cross and set free all the sinners who were there in torment.

And the devil wept and mourned, for he thought he would get no more sinners for hell.

Then God said to him, “Do not weep, for I shall send you all those who are self-righteous in their condemnation of sinners. And hell shall be filled up once more until I return.”

From Anthony De Mello’s Song of the Bird. (New York: Image, 1984. p.106)

• Saddleback Magic and Willow Creek Voodoo. “Maybe I finally found a resolution for this new year: Apply a bit more critique to brand names and theolo-hype.” 01/08/2008

Interview with Tony Jones, author of “The New Christians” (Part 1)

The New Christians: Dispatches from the Emergent Frontier

The following is Part 1 (Part 2) of an interview with Tony Jones about his forthcoming book The New Christians: Dispatches from the Emergent Frontier (to be released March 3, 2008). Tony is the national coordinator of Emergent Village, and a doctoral fellow in practical theology at Princeton Theological Seminary. Find out more at Tony’s website.

JAKE BOUMA: Tell the readers a little about yourself - education, ministry experience, family life, etc. How did you get from baby Tony J. to the author of “The New Christians”?

TONY JONES: I grew up in Edina, Minnesota, the same town where I now reside. My parents were (are) great people who were faithful, but didn’t take their faith too seriously. And I mean that in a good way. So many of my friends in ministry grew up in homes that were spiritually toxic. Not me. My parents are highly educated, well-rounded people. They highly valued education and made sure that my brothers and I were serious about school.

We went to a great church — a funny hybrid of mainline and evangelical Protestantism, and I was very involved there growing up. I went to everything. And that church had a great stance on letting kids move into leadership positions early, so I was counseling camp and teaching Sunday school, etc., even when I was in junior high. From there I went to Dartmouth College and immediately to Fuller Seminary, a journey that I recount in my latest book (The New Christians: Dispatches from the Emergent Frontier).

After seminary, I was a missionary for three years, working primarily with Oglala Lakota people of the Pine Ridge Reservation in South Dakota. Then I took the job as minister to youth and young adults at my home church. It was there that I hooked up with Doug Pagitt and some of the other early emergent leaders. Honestly, my life hasn’t been the same since. This book is a record of our thoughts and activities over the past ten years.

Read the rest of this entry »

A “Lost” sprint

It’s no secret that I’m on the Heroes bandwagon, or that I used to be on the 24 bandwagon (Let’s be honest; the show’s just no good anymore). But only recently did I jump on the Lost bandwagon, and it’s incredible. How I avoided this show for four years, I’ll never know.

My mom got me the season one DVDs for my birthday (two months early, mind you), and I’ve watched 16 episodes thus far. My goal is to be totally caught up before the WGA-strike-shortened fourth season begins on January 31. Let’s do some math.

There are 8 episodes left to watch in season one, 23 episodes in season two, and 22 episodes in season three, for a total of 53 episodes left to watch to be totally caught up. Starting today, there are 26 days until the 31st. That means I need to watch an average of 2.04 episodes per day until the season four premier¹. I initially titled this post “A ‘Lost’ marathon”, but methinks “sprint” is a bit more appropriate.

Any other Lost fanatics out there (No spoilers, please)?

• Iowa and the Poles of Protestantism by Diana Butler Bass is a quick and interesting read about the denominational affiliations of Huckabee and Obama. “As a Southern Baptist, Huckabee emphasizes Christian conversion, personal morality, and individual character. Obama, as part of a liberal denomination [UCC], articulates the communal vision of progressive Protestantism, appealing to human goodness, optimism, and social justice… They are replaying, in dynamic new voices, an old disagreement in American religion.” 01/04/2008

Twitter & the Iowa caucuses

I participated in the Iowa caucuses tonight in support of Barack Obama, who blew away Edwards, Clinton, and the rest of the field.

I caucused for the first time in 2004 for Howard Dean, and both experiences were intriguing and fun. This time around I was “elected” (I use quotes because it’s no big deal, seriously) as a delegate for Obama to the county convention. The whole process is actually quite convoluted (At the county convention, delegates are chosen to attend the state-congressional-district convention, at which point delegates to the national convention are picked. You follow?)

Anyway, I live-twittered my time at the caucus, and below you’ll find a redacted timeline of my tweets. The folks at Townhall.com organized a cool citizen-journalism effort via twitter, e-mail, and text messaging to report caucus results, which I participated in as well. I digress.

6:25pm → This place is packed
6:51pm → All the young people I see are in the Obama camp
6:56pm → What if all these neighborhood people came to our church?
6:59pm → This would be fun if it was also a candidate look-alike contest. I found Hillary.
7:05pm → Overheard - “People over here [in the Obama camp] just look sensible.” [This is actually a quote from my brother]
7:06pm → Here we go…
7:14pm → 264 people here.
7:26pm → Obama has 97 out of 264 before any debating.
7:32pm → Richardson and Biden have disbanded… No Kuccinich support at all
7:35pm → This elementary school bathroom smells like cupcakes and urine
7:41pm → No surprise… It’s down to Obama, Clinton, and Edwards. People are trying to convert the leftovers
8:07pm → The results are in: Obama 4, Edwards 2, Clinton 2
8:08pm → I hear a lot of people talking about Obama dominating Iowa. I am excited to turn on the news.
8:10pm → Been talking with a student reporter for the Yale Daily News
8:15pm → I was just nominated as a county delegate for Obama
8:51pm → Wow… Obama won by 7%.

What are your reflections on the caucuses (Iowans), and/or reactions to the results (anyone)? Leave a comment and let me know!

• Here’s a good primer on the Iowa (Democratic) Caucuses and their political significance. “Unlike any other state, what the Iowa Caucuses offer is the chance to see people deciding whom to pick after their first choice for president does not make it in the first round of voting. That forced compromise and the debate accompanying it — coming at the start of the presidential season — is close to how people vote on Election Day.” 01/02/2008

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